How to Apologize

We all need to apologize every once-in-a-while... or more often than once-and-a-while whether we want to admit it or not. Apologizing is tough. Admitting fault to ourselves and others is difficult! Nonetheless apologizing can create some awesome results if you're sincere about it.

When you apologize you make yourself vulnerable, but it shows good will to admit that you're wrong and change your behavior. Not only that, but it makes people comfortable being around you because you've been able to prove that you're approachable and humble.

If you want to apologize sincerely mix these ingredients together for a perfect apology.

  • "I'm sorry"
  • Address what you did and that you're not proud of it
  • Express empathy!
    • an example of this looks something like, "It must have hurt when I did X."

"I'm sorry you feel that way" is never an apology; it's an effort to manipulate and deflect the person who was hurt. That statement places blame on the feelings of the person who was hurt. In the words of Louis CK, "When a person tells you that you hurt them, you don't get to decide that you didn't."

Lydia Weibel